Tru Stories


Chapter 1 - First Steps on the Path of Love

July 2002


Dear David Truman,

I have read a lot of what you have to say, and am extremely interested. You see, I'm right at the beginning of my search for truth. I've looked at every religion I could ever imagine myself being involved in, and find that there's a strong force of good behind all of them, but at the same time each of them closes the doors to any other religion. For this reason I find it almost impossible to commit myself to any religious spiritual path, because I cannot deny the truth and goodness that lies behind all of them. I would like to keep an open mind towards all truth and love based religions while still following some sort of pathway. Your method of spiritual development seems to me the best option, so I would like to start now.

You should be aware that I am 15 years old, and therefore a difficult student 50% of the time. Taking into consideration that teenagers are difficult students (in any subject), I am asking you to teach me in any way you will.

My biggest spiritual problem at the moment is my impulsiveness, hot temper, and inability to control myself. I'm afraid I have a reputation for being a bit of a wild streak, but I'm working on a more stable lifestyle (without much success so far). I want to gain wisdom, develop my relationship with God, and find inner peace and the ability to love purely and untainted. Your help would be appreciated more than you can imagine. I am headed downhill right now. Thank you for your wisdom. Please write back if you're interested in teaching me in some form.

With Respect,

Mana Pretorius (from Johannesburg, South Africa)

P.S. Having read some of your teachings I haven't yet come across a statement that I would recognize as purely of one source or religion. Where have you picked up the teachings that you know?


Dear Mana,

Thanks for your interest. I was very impressed with your understanding for a teenager.

I agree with you, that there is truth and goodness in all religions. Only dogma and prejudice are bad. To be open to God and to love is best. This is what real spirituality is all about, all over the world, and probably all over the Universe.

God gave you the inner wisdom to know these things in your soul. You are greatly blessed to be so keenly aware of these truths.

I built this teaching out of the good things I learned from many religions. You noticed that. I wanted to show that the basic spiritual truth is something all religions and all people can know, and do know.

And also, I've learned many things directly from the Still Small Voice. I am led and guided; that's the way it has been for me for a long time now. I was given that because I wanted it bad, and for a long time. "Knock and it shall be opened," you know.

I also learned from talking to people, and being with people. I spent many years asking more questions than anything else, and so people told me many things.

I know what you mean about how teenagers can be difficult. But really, teenagers are not a problem -- ego is a problem. Ego meaning: being selfish and self-centered, and not loving.

You can take courses from us. We will give you a mentor for that. And, if you like, because I respect where you are coming from, I would be glad to write you about any questions, and things you are going through. I will talk to you about anything, as long as it is real and important to you. That is what I'm here for, you should know. You will be important to people, and that's another reason why I would invest energy in you.

As you know, it's not religion that people really need. What they need is spiritual wisdom, and a way to connect personally to God, and to their own higher Self.

To connect with God and your higher Self, the most important thing is that you love in your heart. This is how to do it: Sit down twice a day, for five to twenty minutes, and love with all your heart. Who are you supposed to love? Just love! You can love other people, or God, or if you want, you can love the whole world. But just do it sincerely, and feel it truly. When you do that, I bet you will begin to feel God's presence. That's how you know you are loving for real. Just try that for a day or two, and let me know what you think. Okay?

Later on, once you get the hang of this part, I will show you how you can do that with your friends. God will show you wonderful things when you do that, because God said, "Where two or more are gathered in My name, there I am also." My friends all do this together, and I can tell you: God keeps His promises!

Be good -- and being a little bit wild is not necessarily too "bad," you know. Don't be too hard on yourself, okay? But at the same time, as you know, you must control yourself better, and you must be especially careful not to hurt others with that temper. Otherwise, it will be very hard to feel good about yourself. So just take care of it. You can do it. You just have to decide -- that's all there is to it. Do it for love's sake, okay?

Thanks for all your interest and your true sincerity.

Bye for now,



Dear David,

Thank you for your generous advice. I didn't expect to get an answer so quickly -- it's a relief to find someone who answers my questions at all. I think that developing love for God, man, and the Universe is the most worthwhile effort in all creation.

I know it seems very early, but I have some questions that I need answers to on a long-term basis:

Firstly, there is a huge amount of chaos around me, among my relatives and in my direct family. There are various issues, including health problems, recent death, criminal attacks, insanity and emotional instability. Also, we live in a country where there is a lot of crime and a bad economy, so that creates a lot of stress for my parents. However, I feel strong and able to give what needs to be given. My problem is that, being 15 years old, I don't have the means (i.e.: transport, experience, and the respect of adults that would enable me to offer them support). I can't waste what should be given. How should I handle this? I know I can help.

Secondly, I'm often told that I'm restless, and a lot of people think I'm hyperactive. At the moment, as you know, my energy is being channeled into self-destructive activity. I would like to channel that energy into serving God, but I don't know what a person my age can do that would take up enough time and energy. What would you suggest? I am open to any suggestions.

Thirdly (and if I tell you this, you may or may not think I'm delusional), I've always had these experiences: the feeling is so amazing that it would be hard to fully describe in an e-mail. I feel like I'm being opened up and filled up, and my head becomes completely clear. I usually have bursts of energy after this, but sometimes the peace of these experiences puts me to sleep.

Please tell me what you make of this. If you think I'm just crazy, don't hesitate to express that belief.

One last question: My friends and I have been experimenting with a lot of magic practices, like trying to levitate and trying to call up spirits. Since we started that, I've had nightmares almost every night, and I worry that maybe I did something wrong. What do you think about that?

Thank you,



Dear Mana,

Thanks for writing back. I enjoy hearing from you. You have such a great spirit. I can only say I feel much respect for you.

About whether you are crazy or delusional: Crazy is usually not from the experience, but from your judgment. You think to yourself, "I'm having this experience, I must be crazy" -- and lo and behold, you feel crazy. You are not crazy -- except when you are driving yourself crazy by thinking you're crazy.

I'm familiar with the experience you describe. It is a mystical initiation in the body, and feeling, and emotion, all wrapped up into one. You insist that you must be reunited with Life; your heart is pining for that. These things happen to soothe your soul, to answer your heart, because it is through experience, not just words, that certain Things can be known. This is nothing to freak out about at all. It is just part of what is. Life has mysteries, and that is wonderful. Wouldn't it be so boring if we knew everything, and that's all there was to it? I prefer it like this.

You can make a positive difference to your family. To help, you don't need transportation, and you don't have to be older.

There are two things: One, be strong. That means: avoid gross temptations, stay out of stupid trouble and bad paths, and keep your life together. You can't be strong and good for others if you're getting yourself messed up. So you have to pull yourself together, and forget the stupid stuff that goes nowhere. Okay?

Two: love. To help, what you really need to do is love in your heart. If you love these people in your heart, you will find that it helps you and them, both. This is very subtle, but very real. Relationships are not physical things, you see? Relationships exist in the mind and the heart. Therefore, if you love someone in your mind and your heart, you will find that the next time you see them, the relationship has changed. This is a powerful and effective way to give real support.

Now, for me to effectively help you in the way you asked, you have to use the things I tell you, okay? I am real serious with you, and I am counting on you to be serious back, and try these things. Otherwise, my time is wasted. So, next time you write, tell me exactly what you did from what I told you, and what you experienced -- I am talking about sitting down morning and evening and loving in your heart.

No point calling up spirits, in my opinion. These things can be left as they are. The real work you have to do is among the living, not ghosts and spirits. Never get too concerned about this kind of stuff, and don't bother to pursue it. That is a side trip -- love is the main highway. Go on the highway, okay? That's where you want to be, obviously. So, be there! Only you can decide the road you are going to take. So make up your mind, and then walk on that road. That's all there is to it.




Dear David,

I did the love thing for the first time last night. I always thought the act of loving is to give, but everyone was asleep, so I had to start somewhere else. I began by thinking of what I love about the people closest to me. That made me feel the love I have for them very intensely. I even discovered that I love the things about them that irritate me. I felt the most amazing warmth; it was as if love was flowing through me like a river. Soon, I had reached a deep realization about how much I really love everything and everyone, even the people that I don't get along with; and I suddenly felt light, as if I was going to just float up into the air -- physically! I realized that my loved ones are all part of me, and we are all entwined in each other's lives and beings, along with the rest of creation. Even when I stopped concentrating, and moved onto some things that I had to get done, the love stayed there. It was still there when I woke up this morning.

This morning I loved actively, by talking, and by looking after some of my parent's needs. When I'm with them and loving them, I feel as if I'm shining, and the light is reaching into them and lighting them up. I think it uplifted the mood of the whole household!

I think the only way to live is to love as much as you can. As soon as you make the decision to love, there seems to be a huge supply of love in your heart, ready to be used. I think this is the purpose of humanity: to love each other and to love God.

I have seen that the problem with most relationships is that people are always thinking of how they have been affected, and how things have hurt or healed them. I think that for a relationship to work, people need to take each other's feelings as their own. They need to suffer for each other, be happy for each other, and care about each other's feelings and needs, as much as their own. True love is living for others as you would live for yourself.

Thank you for your guidance,



Yes, my dear Mana,

Good job! You tried, and Love responded to your love, as I knew it would.

I feel the softening of your spirit in that. My dear girl, a little piece of yourself, a beautiful piece, is returning to your awareness. In all the chaos you experienced, you were hardening, and becoming too fearful. That's when you start putting up the walls. But now you are coming back to the goodness in you.

About your love meditation: When that love flows through you, at some point you realize that it's God's love flowing through you, and you feel that the vibration of God is all around you -- and then you love everyone, not just someone. And finally, you realize that you are Love, just as God is Love. At that point, it's best just to surrender yourself, and be with God. The most blessings radiate from that, so it's okay that you are not trying to love at that stage, just being love.

You said:

"I did the love thing for the first time last night. I always thought the act of loving is to give, but everyone was asleep so, I had to start somewhere else."

But Mana, as you see, giving is not just actions, like doing favors, taking care of, or doing dishes. Giving is also these things:

You give your heart. You give your tenderness, and feelingness, and empathy, and consideration, and realness. Oh, what gifts those are whenever they are shared!

You create a gift in your mind, which you can then give later. This is like making a painting or a poem for someone else; you work on it in advance. It might take hours to make it, but then, taking time to make a gift is part of the giving, yes? For example, you can give people a good feeling about themselves by holding a good feeling about them inside yourself. Then when you see them, that feeling you stored up for them comes out -- even if you don't outwardly express it. They can feel it anyway. When you feel their beauty and goodness, they can feel that, and this makes them feel so much better.

The mind is a powerful and important tool for love. Our thoughts about people are -- or can be -- great gifts. You see, everyone feels what we think of them. So, by thinking thoughts of loving and blessing for people, we are creating in ourselves an attitude that will be supportive of them when we see them. This is a great thing we can do to help people, to think beautiful things about who they are. And it is the answer to the prayer everyone has: to be thought well of.

And then, another part of loving is being:

When you be love, you radiate that love, and that gives love to everyone around you. Like, when you see a friend, and they are so full and so happy, that makes you happy instantly! You feel it. They are giving you a great gift just by being in that condition, yes? As they say, "You can't give what you don't have." If you are love, and you are in the bosom of love, then you have much love to give.

So, part of love is creating in yourself the state or condition in which you are able to give. This is the primary love-reason for you to avoid that downward spiral you were in: it makes you unhappy. And if you're unhappy, it's hard to help others be happy. The love-reason for avoiding bad stuff and trouble is to protect and cultivate the seed of your own happiness better. It is knowing your limits to say, "I cannot do this and most likely still be happy."

Granted, no one can always be happy. That would be fake. But you can protect your happiness from too many low thoughts and behaviors, and you can do positive things to boost your happiness. You do what you can, and it makes a difference. That's all.

Also, love does have an active aspect, and one should use it. Your thoughts on that are true. Love involves real sacrifice, and the love that someone will not show is probably not a very strong love. You must love in action, as well as in your mind. Do remember, though, to love with your heart when you are loving with your body. Then it is complete and whole. That keeps it being love, and makes sure that it never becomes just going through the motions.

Love is worth investing in, yes? Last night, a friend of mine found her way into loving and feeling in a way that was so beautiful. She found that part of loving where you are committed, through pain and pleasure, regardless, you are there. This is such a wonderful thing. She looked so different, like she was born, and she was in her body for real. These are things I believe in and work for -- things of the heart.




Dear David,

David, I want to tell you something: This might sound weird, but, I think I knew you before I met you. When I was a little girl, I knew about a man that I hadn't yet met. At eleven years old I started to write poems about him: a man who lived very far away, across the ocean, who I was waiting for. Strange for a little girl, but it was very real. When I was about thirteen I "forgot" about it, considering it a childhood fantasy; but never entirely, I always held the vision of that man in my heart.

Just before I met you I started to have dreams about him again. He would give me advice, but when I would wake up I couldn't remember it anymore. He once opened his arms wide and invited me to come and hug him. Another time I dreamed that I was running away from evil incarnate, and the man appeared and began moving objects out of my way as I ran. Eventually, I stopped running, and asked him, "Why are you helping me?" and he just looked at me and said, "Go that way," and pointed. I once met him on the beach in a dream. Jesus was there (at least, I think it was Jesus), and He told me to go and talk to people about what I know. So I talked to a lot of people, and then they all came and stood with the man, and Jesus, and me.

I used to look at everybody's faces as I walked about, thinking I might see that man. David, I think you are that man. You feel like him. I think we were meant to meet each other.

Thank you so much for everything that is happening. Through loving people I have seen so many changes take place. I "worked on" loving my parents most of this day, and by this evening they are more close to each other than I've seen them in years. They are appreciating each other. It's as if the love that I purposely gave them today is growing and shining in their relationship with one another. Love has worked miracles in my house today. I almost can't wait to get to school tomorrow and love all my friends in the same way.

It's wonderful to be able to tell you these things. This kind of talk makes many people I know uncomfortable. Because of that, I don't really feel like I can talk about all the things that are happening in me right now with my friends. I just don't think they would respond that well.

I'm glad to hear about your friend. That is wonderful.

Once again, thank you so much.




Dear Mana,

You are so welcome! What you're doing is beautiful. Everything must be so happy -- especially the angels and God. And me, too. I am so happy for you, and for everyone who benefits from this.

It's true that talking about these things makes people uncomfortable. That is an unfortunate fact of life. The power you are using -- love -- is more feared on this Earth than respected. Particularly, as you know, people fear change. If they see you change quickly, then quite likely, instead of celebrating with you, they may become upset. They may try to discourage you, or stop you. That is sad, but there it is.

Taking these things into account, here is my advice on how to behave for now:

1. Love in secret. Love in your soul, your heart, and your mind. The power of this is perfect in itself, as you have already discovered.

2. You can love openly, but when you take action in the spirit of love, keep your actions small. Do that with your heart open, and your mouth shut. The effect of these little actions will be every bit as big as if you had done huge things, like giving a house or a million dollars.

3. As far as speaking of these things: thank God in your heart, with great joy, and with tears of love and gratitude. This is the reality of all of it -- between you and God. And again, you can always write to me, and you can say everything you wish to me.

There are actually two good reasons for this quiet way of loving: One, so the secret powers of love can have their way without causing troubles. Two, so that your ego does not get involved. Staying pure and true protects your progress in loving as God would have us love.

You know, not everyone can come on this path -- only because they do not wish to. That's why the higher path is one on which you will be obliged to part ways with many old friends. It's never easy to let people you love go the ways they want to keep going; but in some cases, that's what we have to do.

On the spiritual path, you will walk in close company only with those who wish to walk this way. But in your heart, you can love everyone anyway, because they are all children of God, and they are all loved dearly by God.

Let none of this dampen your spirit, dear girl. You have every reason to be happy and confident. Place your faith in God, and not in this world. Then, with your spirit undimmed, love in this world, in the ways I've told you to love. This is the way for now. Things may be different in some future time.

By the way: You asked the man in your dream why he was helping you, and he replied, "Go that way." Let me answer you for him in plain English:

Spiritual growth is a process that involves getting help. It's like learning to play the guitar: you can learn much faster if you have someone to teach you how. Trying to learn by yourself can sometimes waste a lot of time on dead-ends, mistakes, and all that. The rules of the Universe are: if you pray for help, God will send help to you. It's because of your desire that you have found help. That's how the Universe works. So, you are just working within the System, and the System works.

Keep faith in God, and in the System of help that will guide you through this strange world. Never doubt God's love. Everything you need will be given you, but you must have faith, or else you will not accept it when it comes to you. That's why the faith is your part.




Dear David,

I was so happy to get your e-mail this morning before I went to school. It was the perfect way to start the day: with your guidance. I am always open to guidance, especially yours at this point.

I followed your instructions at school today, about how to behave for now. As a result I found that my energy levels were at a peak, but for once they were controllable. The energy became useful rather than just a problem. I was surprised to find that today seemed almost set up for your instructions. There were so many people who needed little things to be given to them; mentally, emotionally, and materially.

It was wonderful to watch people all day. As I gave them the little things that I could and loved them quietly, they seemed to draw the energy into themselves. It was as if we were sharing it; and as we did, it grew and spread across most of the class. It's amazing what happens when you decide to love. So much was different today.

My friends and I didn't feel any need to be doing anything outrageous (which we normally do). We were just happy, and we laughed a lot more than usual. I used to think it was an important aspect of myself to be outrageous, and that not being outrageous would mean not living. But now I'm seeing that I can only live if I don't spend so much time and energy seeking thrills.

I know what you mean about having to let some friends go. I recently let go of a few unhealthy habits, and lost a number of friends at the same time. I'm still glad that I decided to quit doing those things, but I sometimes get bored -- it's hard to be disciplined when you don't know what to do with yourself.

I can also fully appreciate what you say about people reacting badly to love. I want you to know that I'm willing to take some flack for walking towards God. He is what life is, and nothing else competes. So far I have seen only good results. I'll keep you updated.

I really look forward to your e-mails. Your words have taken me to so many beautiful places that I can't wait to see what happens next.

I'd really like to know a little bit more about you and your life. What's your story? You know so much about me, I would love to know more about you. Also, could you send me a picture of you, so that I can have something to base my mental image of you on?

Thank you for everything,




Dear Mana,

What a good report you gave!

I am glad to hear that the Universe gave you all those little things to do for people. That is perfect. The universe always supports whatever we do that is for God. Everything mysteriously organizes itself as needed for that.

And I am also glad to hear that you are willing to take some flack for God's sake. So am I, and I have taken quite a bit of it.

Now then -- onward! Here is some fine-tuning about how to support your close friends (and other people too) with love:

The more deeply you love someone in your heart, the more deeply they will feel and respond to it. So, for example, when you talk to your friend, or walk with her down the street, do this: Hold her in your heart, by inwardly loving her in your heart as deep as you can feel. Part of that love is faith. As you walk and talk, have great faith in her goodness, her beauty, her strength. When you hold faith for her in your heart, your love will come out of you sideways, and in every direction. You do not need to direct it at her, like a pointed thing.

You should love your friends just like the sun, in a circle of radiant energy. You don't have to be pointy about it. You let your love be like a bubble. You put this bubble all around them. That way, it is God's love that comes through you -- and believe me, it is just perfect.

This is where the self-control you speak of becomes possible. If energy travels in a line, that is narrow and tight; so it becomes pointy, and jerky -- even explosive. But when you give energy in all directions, any amount of energy is smooth and healing, like the full moon, or the sun. A magnifying glass focuses light in a pointy way, and that can burn your hand, but the regular sun shines everywhere. It is bright and beautiful. It surrounds you, and you bask in the sun. It does not hurt anything.

It is this love that you can put into every little thing, even a pencil. You see, everything can be vehicle for love. But then, at the same time, the air we all breathe is a perfect vehicle too. Real love just goes in the heart of everything. Yes, and it spreads from heart to heart, just as you say it did with your mother and father, and in your classroom.

This is the process of Divine love. There are many people all over the world who share God's love this way. Some of them have religions, and some don't. No matter. No religion or priest is required for this love, because God is everywhere, and God's love is in everyone. And everyone who wishes to know this love, and give this love, can always do so. Nothing is more true than this -- the direct relationship between man and God.

About me: Well, I was raised Catholic, but I did not find what I was looking for in the Church, so, after much frustration, I quit when I was 16. Then I had an out of body experience, and that made me very curious. So I found a teacher who was a mystic, from India. He taught me everything he knew, and never asked for anything. I would go to his house two or three times a week, and he would teach me things, whatever he thought I should know, from dinner time to nine or ten. That went on for two years, until he went back to India. With him I learned to meditate, and I became a yogi or mystic myself -- and I had a very deep experience at that time, which you could call enlightenment.

And then, I continued seeking for ten more years. I had several teachers from both East and West. Then I thought: "God is love, and yet I am still running away from love in all this mystical seeking." So I decided not to be such a hermit, and I invited anyone from the street to move into my house. I had real relationships, and tried to face the challenge of human love. From that, I came to understand many things about people that I didn't know before, because I was not interested before. That experience, which was intense and lengthy, proved very valuable.

Anyhow, after some time, this allowed for another mystical experience, through which I became quite solid in my connection to Life and to God. This opened up a relationship with Divinity that is quite functional. That was more than twenty years ago, and I have been the same in those ways ever since.

Since then, I have just given myself to my close friends, with a commitment to them, and they have supported me to do what I have been doing. I have no worldly obligations, particularly, but I have strong human relationships. And most of the time, I just try to help humanity, as I have described to you. So, for example, if you reach out to me, then I will give you my heart, and everything. This is my life, how I live it.

Now, it's important for you to understand: because I love people a bunch, amazing things can happen around people when they know me. So naturally, because of that, I got to be considered important, and a teacher, and all that, especially by my close friends. So then, people wanted to idolize me, like people tend to do with important people in their lives. There is something good and sincere about that, of course, but there are also obvious problems with it. The thing about being "The Man" is something I do not like, or want. I have seen that happen many times. It happened to my teachers in the past, so I had plenty of opportunities to see how, a lot of times, that creates distance, which is not good. There is a true love that is highly devoted, but it does not have to be distancing, or othering. And it should not be.

So when it came down to me, I have always insisted, "No, I am not special, or different. I am the same as you. What I know and do, everyone can know and do." I just want to love people, and do God's work with people. Specialness only gets in the way of that. So be careful not to put me on a pedestal. Okay?



P.S. I have attached a photo of myself for you.

David Truman


Dear David,

I'm writing to you a lot, huh? I hope it's not too much.

I understand your problem, about being "the man." I think I would feel the same way.

Thank you for your picture. You know, I have a special interest in eyes. I used to fool a lot of people into thinking that I was telepathic because I could read their eyes. There's a lot you can see if you look closely enough.

You sound as if you've had a beautiful life, a lot of learning and loving. The two things that I want to do most with my life.

Things are going well with me and love. It seems to have really reached people in a big way. Today one of my teachers actually hugged me, because I had done my homework for a change.

Also, as I've changed these last few days, my friends seem to be changing with me. It takes a lot less to make us laugh, and things that we used to find boring we can now appreciate. We don't have to try so hard to have fun, because we can please each other and ourselves by just being together as a group.

I used to be a really bad influence on my friends, until a few days ago. The problem was, my friends all think that the more bad and outrageous they are, the more mature and "wise." And so, each time somebody does something bad, everybody else has to do it too, in order to stay cool. Until now, I was one of the people who was always driving up the price of "coolness" by doing outrageous things; because of that, I caused my friends to go downhill faster than they needed to. Now, I want to influence them in a good way. I want to repay them for the damage I've done.

For me, it was never about being cool, so much. I just didn't want to live a stupid, mundane life. And the only way I knew how to rebel against that was to do all kinds of crazy things, just to show everyone that I didn't think their values were important. I've always stuck to my values, you see, even though my values have sometimes been a little screwed up. The result of that is that I've been able to influence my friends in my life (I haven't had many friends, but the ones I've had have respected me).

I've also always looked after people, but not always in the right way. I've always had a strong but corrupted loyalty towards the crowd of people I was friendly with. The kind of loyalty that makes people feel like they're doing the right thing even when they are doing the wrong thing. We all had that kind of loyalty toward one another. Last year my math teacher gave me some trouble (quite rightly, in fact, because I was creating problems for her in class). I railed against her to my friends, and without me even asking them to, they all gave her so much trouble for it that she became afraid to discipline me after that. I know this probably makes me sound horrible. I was horrible, really. I had a frightening temper, and no self-control.

Nowadays I'm really looking after my friends. Instead of being some kind of mafia head, I've become a choir captain, encouraging my friends to sing in whatever way suits their voice best -- but I've already found out that not everybody wants to join the choir. Some of my friends are changing, but not all. It seems like it's much easier to lead people into rebellion than into love. So, I don't really know what to do. I feel like I've corrupted some of my friends, by making them think that outrageousness and rebellion is everything, and now I can only half-reverse the process. What do you suggest?

Anyway, I am so glad to be free of that old life. I feel as if the last few years of my life have been slowly building up to the last few weeks of my life. It's like I've been trapped in a cocoon until I was ready to break free and fly. I would expect such a sudden change to leave me a little disoriented, but instead I've become more clear-headed than I ever remember being.

Love, Mana

P.S. I have a question for you: At my age, I haven't had much worldly experience yet, and I don't particularly plan to or feel attracted to experiencing the things that most people experience. Do you think that will be an impediment to me, when it comes to trying to help people in the future? I also want to know: what is evil, really? Is it just the opposite of good?

P.S. I attached a photo of myself to this e-mail, too.



Dear Mana,

Well, did you see anything in my eyes, Ms. Psychic? What did you see?

Anyhow, what's up for me, among other things, is that I love you, and I love everything you are doing. It is all truly wonderful. So there!

About your last letter: Yes, you are free to fly. And I will help you in every way I can. Flying is very good.

When it comes to worldly experience, it's true that it can be of great benefit to have "been there and done that." Worldly experience deepens your understanding of humanity, and helps you communicate with others with real empathy.

But experience of all kinds is what we make of it. We learn from it what we choose to learn. A knife in the hand of a surgeon is different than the same knife in the hand of a murderer. The intentions are different. The same can be said of experience: two people can have the same experiences, but come out in different places, because of the way they choose to use their experiences. Some people, when they have negative experiences, turn them to good use. Other people have positive experiences, and even high spiritual experiences, and then turn them to bad use. That proves what a big zero experience is, in the great scheme of things. Will counts much much more.

The real goal of life is to get your will and God's lined up. "Thy will be done." God's will is love, because God is love. If your will is love, then your will and God's will are lined up. Then you can cooperate with God, and God can love through and as you, no matter what experiences you have or haven't had. That is when miracles happen. God needs partners to help Him love on this Earth, yes?

About your friends: There is a Hindu saying, "If the teacher eats meat and is surrendered to God, many disciples will eat meat, but not so many will surrender to God." In other words, people copy what they want to copy, and they don't copy whatever they don't want to copy. That is why it was easier to lead your friends into rebellion than into love. They wanted rebellion. You have taken way too much guilt on yourself for what you and your rebel friends have done. You did not "corrupt" anyone except insofar as they wanted to be corrupted. The truth is, if you hadn't done it, they would have found someone else to help them be corrupted.

What should you do now? Live your heart as it now is. Help the ones that appreciate your new direction, and respect the free will of those that don't. You should still love them all in your heart, of course. But you are spiritually obliged to let all people follow their own chosen path. Ours is not to judge that. Okay?

Regarding your question about evil: Evil is the power of will used to oppose (or deny) goodness and reality. But will itself is not opposite to good. Will is simply the creative power of the sons and daughters of God. Will is free to choose for good or not. The basis for evil is the idea of separation -- separation from God, separation from goodness, and separation from one's fellow brothers and sisters.

Don't worry about writing too much. There is no such thing in the process we are going through. I will happily give you everything God requires you to be given through me -- whatever your soul requires. Everything that can be done through more direct means -- that is, through direct spiritual experiences -- will be handled that way. You can rest assured, the work we are doing will be good for the world. It is not selfish on your part. It is necessary for the greater good. This work is intensely personal, but at the same time, it transcends both of us.




Dear David,

Thank you for your letter. Everything you said made perfect sense.

Lately I've felt overwhelmingly loved. I'm constantly aware of it, how much God loves me as a human being. And another thing I'm feeling is that there is an endless supply of love and truth that God has been ready to give me for ages. It's as if every time I make the decision to love, God's love pours into me; and whenever I really want to know the truth, I find that it's already there, but I was just looking in the wrong place, or allowing myself to be distracted.

About your eyes: I don't think I could surprise you. Seeing them over the computer is a huge disadvantage. But tell me if any of this is true:

There are lot of things going through your head all the time, and you need to express yourself somehow or you become overwhelmed. You look at things and see the so-called "unreal" part of them. You look so closely that you can "see" God's movements as you watch people, and the Earth. You always analyze things and look at the deeper side of things. You probably spend very unusual hours awake, in part because of this. You look like someone who hates doing nothing, more than most people. You have to keep your mind stimulated. You're happiest when busy with something that you've chosen to be doing. You don't like doing things that have been forced upon you (you probably hated the school system). When you talk with people in "normal" society you often feel frustrated, as if you've heard this conversation before, because people always talk about the same things. And, you know what you want.

I love you, too.




Dear David,

There have been some problems with people today. It was a hard day. It seems like the fact that I've changed is too much for most people to believe.

One of my teachers from last year said, without any prompting: "The sooner everyone knows how bad you are for people, the better!" This is a teacher who hasn't been involved in my life for seven months. She knows nothing about what I've become! Why did she suddenly have to come into the picture without a clue about what had changed?

Another problem was with a girl that I don't really know very well. She's the type who refuses to be happy. Last year I got mad at her for calling me and my friends, "children of Satan." A lot of people saw me lose my temper with her, and that caused them to dislike and avoid her. Ever since, she has resented me. Now, she's seen me become a nicer person, and she seems to want to take advantage of that by attacking me. At one point today she was challenging me, and I didn't know what to do. I came close to being very mean, the old way. Luckily something happened that pulled me away from the situation before I lost my temper, so I have time to think of a better plan. I don't have one. What should I do?

And worst of all, I am so different from all of my friends now that I can't fit in any more. They feel distant from me. I used to be a really bad influence, and now I'm trying to be a good one, but it's not working out. People seem to like to take big giant steps towards nowhere much more than even the tiniest step towards God and Love!

I've learnt a very important lesson today: that it takes longer to gain people's trust than it does to become trustworthy. People don't trust that easily, I guess. Another thing I've learnt is that when you change too quickly a lot of people don't believe it. They think it's false and try to challenge it. I suppose the only way to deal with that is to keep it up.




Dear Mana,

This is a great time for you. Your enlightenment is being tested. Don't worry if you do not pass every test. Do your best, and have faith.

Those are major challenges some people are giving you. The challenge is to love them in your heart even if they are being negative with you -- and definitely not revert to the habit of retaliation, etc. You did well in that you did not stoop to lashing out this time, even though you were sorely tempted to do so. Next time, let's hope you don't get pulled away. That way, you can stand up for your spiritual values on your own!

I know you don't want to go back to the old ways. So, look out for the way you use your mind. Beware of the natural tendency to re-invest mental energy in garbage, lower thoughts, concerns, and problems of all kinds. Keep your head above those clouds as well as you can. As negative reactions arise in you -- and obviously they sometimes will -- let go of all of the junk and love. That is the only way to be saved from all of that creeping crud. It is difficult, maybe, but that's the challenge.

You have learned a great deal recently. Think about all you've seen. All of it shows you the law of cause and effect. That law operates at the level of mind and heart. Accordingly...

...If you suspect them, they will suspect you back.

...If you love them, they will love you back -- generally, at least.

That's exactly what you have seen. So now, you have two choices:

1. Meditate at length on problems, bad things, and concerns. If you take that path, you will descend into a lower state of mind, a lower state of being. Your bliss will leave you, and people will respond negatively due to the negative vibe in you. For example: If you take your present concerned state of mind to school, you will find that you have a different kind of day than you've enjoyed recently. And, if you continue in that fashion, you will begin to have days that will seem to you to justify going right back into negative behavior patterns (i.e.: "No one cares, so I may as well act out" -- etc.). Presto: depression, delinquency, concerned parents, nasty friends -- the whole nine yards!

Or, on the other hand...

2. Meditate on love. If you love, the world around you will continue to respond to you positively. And, you will feel happy. And, you will continue to be a positive influence on all those around you. As you know, this is the road less traveled -- mostly because it takes more courage to travel it. But it is also the road that leads to everything you could possibly want, and away from everything you could never find truly desirable.

Mana, you can clearly see the workings of this mental "magic." Black magic, or white magic, which kind of magic do you want to perform? What kind of world do you want to see? What kind of feedback do you want to get? Your best choice is to return to love, in the true spirit of love -- and that means, you do it not so much to save yourself as to help others.

The question about trustworthiness: You are right, it takes longer to earn trust than to become trustworthy. But also, being trustworthy requires consistency -- not just being in a good place for a little while. People have a right to suspect that you may quickly return to your old ways, because that often happens. And you are right in saying that only if you stay on your new track can you prove their expectations wrong. Otherwise, they're right -- right?

For example, what if you had some friend, and that friend treated you well most of the time, but turned against you just once a month. Would that person be trustworthy to you? Of course not. So you see, there are two parts to being trustworthy: being good, and staying good. Both parts are reasonable to expect. Okay?




Dear Mana,

It just came to me, what you're up against, and my heart goes out to you. High school is like this giant Viet Nam war zone. All these crazy egos, hating and dissing and tearing everyone to shreds. Then they team up in cliques, and they single people out, and fire their big guns all at once at this person or that. It's merciless insanity. It's like you woke up in hell.

Then, as if that wasn't bad enough, these poor kids are so fickle -- love, hate, love, hate. Unchecked egos are like that: all reaction and no integrity, no loyalty. And even what they call loyalty has nothing to do with what is truly right, so that in itself is disloyal. Disloyal to oneself, to God, and to everyone.

I know how tough it is, being in that kind of madness. It's like, if you can survive high school, Viet Nam looks like a picnic. But you can survive it. You can even grow from it.

The good news is, they're clueless, and you have a clue. So you're incredibly lucky.

The only thing that can help you survive that insanity is love, and God. That's your armor, my dear Mana. So stay with it, okay? Be brave! And I will help you with everything I can. Okay?




Dear David,

Thank you for your letter. What you said was exactly what I needed to hear. It's as if you walked into my soul and had a look around.

I'm sorry about my last letter. I felt so bad yesterday. It was really the same feeling that I used to have all the time, but I never realized how bad it was before.

I'm quite clear now, thanks to you and God. What I want is Love. The answer to every question is Love, because Love is the whole and complete truth about God.

It's so nice to trust. I can trust God and I can trust you. Very soon I will trust myself too, I already love myself and I never would have thought that that would happen.

Thank you so much for being so clear in your head about everything. There aren't many people I know who are like that, so I just want to learn everything you know.

Can you remember everything about how you found Love? It's wonderful. It's like you discover that It's there every moment, and you discover that God is there every moment.

How are things going to change now? And how are they going to stay the same? Tell me everything and anything; whatever you see, think, or feel; whatever you want to tell me.

It's around 3:30 AM here in South Africa. I'm going to school in a few hours. I'll let you know how the battle went when I get back.




WindSky - Chapter 2

WindSky - Table of Contents

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